The Beginning

Here's the deal. I just want to write about this. And this seems to be the best way to do it.

Because I'm so sick of feeling like I'm not pretty. You get me? There are days when I feel and look fantastic...and somedays, I wake up and say, Good Lord, WHY?!. I mean, c'mon, we've all had those days.

But I'm starting a ... revolution.

One where I wake up, and autimatically tell myslef how beautiful I am, even with my hair sticking up in all directions.

Even when I feel gross becuase I've been working out.

Even when I see the boy who broke my heart and made me cry.

Even when the guy I like, doesn't like me.

Because I'm more than the way a guy looks at me.

I've never been one to base my inward happiness on how I look, or to rely on others, mainly, a guy, to make me feel beautiful. But for a while, I let that slip, and did. I'm 20 years old. I weigh 258 pounds. I'm 5'8. I have medium length brown hair, slightly dyed from my younger days, brown eyes, and glasses. I am not little. I am not petit. I am big. Big and loud and funny and loveable and beautiful. I'm beginning to see this. Beginning to own this. Beginning to LOVE THIS. Without someone telling me so...

Februraruy is the month of Love. And like most single girls, I used to dread this month. I mean, Valentines Day? All about that "special someone" and "love" and getting the guy...well POOH to them.

Februray is my offcial I'm going to love myself month.

And if I choose to wear make up and lipstick every day, then so be it.